What will you be doing on April 15? You might be feverishly finishing up your taxes. Since it's a Wednesday, most of you will be in class or at work. But if you're a disaffected conservative without much to do, you've got another option: Throw some tea bags into a local body of water to protest "wasteful spending" by the Obama adminsistration.
In what has to be the most head scratching protest since 12 rich kids took over a lunch room at New York University, the American Family Association has been organizing National TEA (Taxed Enough Already) Day demonstrations all over the country wherein angry citizens reenact The Boston Tea Party and then have a picnic or something.
South Dakota's own Tea Party is taking place at noon in Sioux Falls at Covell Lake (haven't those poor geese gone through enough?) and, according the event's webpage, is organized by none other than local chiropractor and anti-abortion demagogue Allen Unruh.
This event brings up all kinds of questions, like, “Where were these crusaders for liberty and financial responsibilities over the last eight years of out-of-control spending and skyrocketing deficits?” or perhaps, “How much income tax is someone who's free to attend something like this on a Wednesday afternoon actually paying?” and most importantly, “Will the free lunch they're providing include a vegetarian option?”
One thing that probably won't come up at the big outrage and tea fest is the fact that when it comes to federal “pork,” angry tight-fisted South Dakotans are some of the biggest hypocrites of them all. For every dollar of federal tax collected, South Dakota citizens get approximately $1.53 back. We love to believe that we're a state of rugged individualists, pulling ourselves up by our bootstraps, but in reality South Dakota is the welfare queen of the republic and it's unlikely we're going to start paying our own way any time soon.
The group behind the South Dakota stunt (they call themselves The Sons and Daughters of Liberty – how PC!) are no exceptions to the 'pork for me but not for thee' posture. Allen Unruh's wife Leslee has been the recipient of wheelbarrow-fuls of federal abstinence-only money and last I heard, she had no plans to give it back. I suppose it's easier to bite the hand that's been feeding you when there's a good chance the feedings are going to get cut off. But you don't have to be an infamous anti-sex crusader to benefit from public money. Without tax funded public parks, where would the Sons and Daughters and Grandchildren and Second Cousins of Liberty hold these little fetes? Was the privately funded Unruh backyard not available, or did it just not have a lake to throw stuff into?
Obviously, being aware and critical of government spending is an important part of being an informed citizen. But if this kind of goofiness is what we have to look forward to from conservative critics over the next four years, I question if they're going to get very far. Will members of South Dakota Right to Life mount horses and go riding through our small towns, Paul Revere-style, to protest Obama's Supreme Court nominee? Will three corner hats make a sudden comeback at county GOP meetings? That would actually be awesome. I would totally support that. Whatever direction this neo-revolutionary movement takes, I think we can rest assured that it won't actually accomplish anything … which is fine with me.
COLUMN: Outrage over spending is hypocritical
Published: Monday, March 23, 2009
Updated: Monday, March 23, 2009 22:03
7 comments
You complain about Bush's spending, and go Hyper-hypocritical over Obama's? You should be out there protesting as well, but alas, too busy I suppose.
Difference between "goofy conservative protests" and "idiotic liberal protests" appears to me at least to be the conservatives have to take time off from work, while your lib protesters seem to have only to find a way to wake up before noon.